How to Live and Survive at NEST Base
by Princess Serenity Angel
Summary: This is a list of rules that some of the autobots and Dia came up with in order to stop all the madess that happens at the N.E.S.T base. It is also a way for Dia not to try and end up pulling her hair out.


SerenityAngel: yep its me again

Dia: don't forget me either

SerenityAngel: ready to rock and roll Dia

Dia: you bet girlie

SerenityAngel: Alright then disclaimer please

Dia: PrincessSerenityAngel does not own Transformers or anything transformer related for that matter, she does however own me and will not let anyone steal. So no kidnapping folks.

How To Live and Survive at Base

Rules Written By Your Own Dimensional Guardian Dia

Is also edited by Prowl, Will Lennox, Ratchet and Ironhide

Dia: So somehow I managed to get pulled into writing this so here we go!

Rule #1: No Messing with Ironhide's Cannons

(Sam, Leo, Sides, Sunny)

"What happened to 'don't touch what's not yours'?"

"There is now a big hole in the rec area, though why they tried shooting in there is beyond me"

"However, Ironhide did get revenge by shooting certain Red and Yellow bots, which ended up with a cranky medic"

Rule #2: No Messing or Hiding Ratchet's wrenches

(Anyone who wants to piss off the cranky medic)

"It is a good thing I learned never mess with a medic a long time ago"

"But to anyone who does mess with a medic, especially Ratchet, who will most likely, A. Hit you with the found wrenches. B. Give you a REAL fun time the next time you need to go see him. C. Get welded to something.

"Good thing I am not metal"

Rule #3: Watch Your Language around Annabelle

(ALL)

"Seriously you are all old enough to know very well not to cuss in front of her; she is at a learning stage where she repeats anything"

"Though even I will admit that seeing her yell "No good Slagger" at Galloway was really funny"

"However Galloway did not"

"I think Lennox was stuck between scolding her and praising her for saying that"

Rule #4: Do Not Wire the Intercoms to Play Annoying Music at Any Time

(Sunny and Sides)

"Not only is it not funny it is also very annoying"

"You can do it to torture Decepticons during interrogation, but not to annoy everyone especially at 3 o'clock in the MORNING"

"Both of you are just lucky that my room does not have an intercom in it otherwise you would be both running for your lives"

Rule #5: No Limbo

(All Autobots)

"You are not as bendable as we humans are so don't do it"

"Ratchet will not like fixing bots up who are stupid enough to try this"

"And yes Sunny and Sides I am mainly referring to you"

Rule #6: No Taking Away People's Food

(Both sets of twins and Ratchet)

"We are intelligent enough to be able to decide what we can and cannot eat (in some cases will or will not eat)"

"The soldiers will be VERY mad if you hide the coffee and other certain things that they need in order to function"

"On that note STOP STEALING MY LINDT CHOCOLATE, Sides and Sunny it is not funny when you hide it as well, I will get it back and you will get to deal with my business side of my Glaive and will end up with A LOT of scratch marks"

Rule #7: No Animals on Base

(All)

"We don't need Ironhide making more holes in the walls we don't have that kind of budget"

"That does include Mojo and Ironhide would defiantly agree on this "

"The only exceptions to this rule are if someone comes to base with a Seeing Eye dog"

"This also includes my advisor cats Hope and Harmony, my cyber lioness, Galaxy and any other companions of animal nature that decide to journey from Diaxis (A/N: read my profile if you do not know about Dia's background) the reason for this is they all are intelligent and can speak unlike normal animals"

Rule #8: No scanning Cars from Movies

(All Bots)

List so far

Herbie

The Green Hornet

The Mystery Machine

None of Batman's crime fighting cars or motorcycles

Rule #9: No messing with any females during our time of month

(All mechs and males on the base)

"Sunny and Sides decided to piss me off during this time"

"They were found two days later on the ceiling thanks to my magic and both were painted pink with makeup and sparkles on them"

"I have started making a blackmail file just to use against them"

Rule#10: No Pranking Galloway

(Everyone minus Optimus, Prowl, Ratchet, Ironhide and Myself)

"Though I feel that this rule will be ignored"

"This includes the following:

-Putting things like laxative in his Coffee

-putting whoopee cushions under his chair

-messing up his stuff

-painting and or making him different from what he normally looks like

" though sometimes I think the paint is an improvement"

-sticking him to the wall or ceiling

And there will probably be more things put on the list later

Rule#11: NO TOUCHING my staff

"it is my weapon not yours and it only works for me'

"Sunny, Sides and Leo'

"They all got zapped when they tried to take it'

"they also had to run when the charm I put on activated and started chasing them around base'

"sadly Red Alert freaked out and Prowl crashed"

"However it was amusing to see the three getting chased by a magical staff and seeing Leo run and scream like a girl"

' it is even more funny when they notice it is changing forms while chasing them(A/n Look at profile if you did not get the staff

Rule #12: No Abusing Prowl's Glitch

(Sides and Sunny)

" Not only is it not fun for Prowl it is also not your means of an escape route after you pulled a prank or a way to make him shut up"

"You will most likely have Ratchet after you due to this and he will not be nice about it either"

Rule#13: Wrenches and Humans

(Ratchet)

"Do not throw wrenches at us just because you are angry at us"

"We will most likely end up with a bad injury"

"If you try throwing it at me it will end up not hitting me and via my powers will end up lodged where you don't want it to be or hit you where the sun does not shine"

"This is your only warning"

Rule#14: No using Wheelie as Target Practice

(Ironhide)

"I know he is annoying and perverted but he is still not something you can shoot"

" Deceptions on the other hand, Fire away Ironhide"

Dia: That is the end of the first part or chapter of the list

SerenityAngel: please review and if you have any ideas for rules let me know

Dia&SerenityAngel: Bye Bye


End file.
